A long time coming...

Well we finally made it to the doctor for our ultrasound. Our original appointment was about a month ago but we kept having to push it back because of harvest. I was so nervous...I'm not sure why I just was. But when we went into the room for the ultrasound and we saw our baby for the first time I couldn't hold back the tears. It was so incredible! I was amazed at how much we could see, the little arms and legs and a beautiful profile. Our baby looks absolutely perfect :) The tech even commented on how amazing it looked and asked if she could keep a couple to send in for some study at the hospital (I didn't understand most of what she said) but she said our baby was in the perfect position for what they needed. Isn't our baby beautiful!

It was such a wonderful, special experience and I'm so grateful to have an amazing husband to share it with. This journey started almost a year ago when he looked at me and said that he wanted to start trying for a baby. I had been hoping for a while that that was coming but I often tend to rush into things so I was waiting for a confirmation that he felt the same way. We were so sure that we would get pregnant right away and every month that it didn't happen got harder and harder. I started to think that maybe we were meant to adopt, that there were babies brought into the world that were meant to come to our home. I knew if that were the case I wouldn't have loved them any less but it broke my heart thinking about missing the special moments that come with pregnancy.

After so much fasting and prayer, countless blessings and tears, I knew that I needed some kind of answer. So when we went through the temple with Morgan's cousin and her husband, I kept my prayers in my mind and asked Morgan to do the same. After the session I asked him what he felt and we came to the realization that neither of us really felt anything in regards to our questions. I'll admit that I felt so frustrated and defeated. I was sure that the temple would hold our answer. On our way home we stopped to get some groceries and Morgan added a pregnancy test to the pile, (even though I asked him not to). The next morning, I felt inclined to take it. I was sure that the answer would be another let-down but sure enough I saw, very faintly, that second line. I was so excited I couldn't breathe and when I told Morgan I couldn't stop crying!

Since that day, I've still felt like sometimes it's just a dream. And while the nausea isn't fun and I'm not used to being so tired, those things along with my growing belly are beautiful reminders of the special gift that's coming to our home. It's amazing how much we love our baby already!